When you make the brave and bold choice and take the appropriate actions to forgive your past, you will open yourself up to these experiences and a new life of freedom and happiness.

Forgiving your past…

1. Moves you out of denial about your past so you can stop covering up your inappropriate choices with defensive behavior.

When you move out of denial you can accept what you did. With acceptance working in your life, the charge or trigger around the event dissipates and you will feel better. You won’t need to defend what you’ve done anymore because the light of understanding has taken the edge off.  Self-forgiveness has healed the open wound finally.

2. Allows you to embrace opportunities that you don’t see when you are mired in guilt.

When you allow guilt to permeate your thoughts you are not fully present with your friends, with your partner or at work. You are still living in the past and opportunities to better yourself only happen in the now. Forgive your past and open yourself up to miracles in the present.

3. Invites more positive energy into your life because you are feeling better about yourself.

You know what it’s like to be around people who are always negative-it’s painful, draining and can rub off on you pretty quickly. If you are negative about your life because of unconscious unforgiveness toward yourself, you actually drain the people around you of their energy. As you forgive yourself your loved ones feel better and want to be around you more. Positivity attracts positive people, opportunities, and events into your life.

4. When you take responsibility for your choices you become the hero in your life instead of the victim of it.

Plainly said you can be a victim to your past by blaming others for what happened to you. Instead, by taking responsibility, you become the hero of your life by learning the lessons and passing them on through service, sharing, and your choices. Now I’m not saying to take all the responsibility for something in the past if it is not all yours, instead forgive yourself for your part in things and then share how strong you became because of what you lived through.

5. Addictions such as overwork and overeating fall away because you are no longer subconsciously punishing yourself.

There is freedom in acknowledging that you have a choice now and that you choose to forgive your past. As you forgive, you fill yourself with loving and in that place of loving there is no need to stuff or suppress your feelings anymore.

6. The person you think you hurt may have let their anger against you go years before and yet you are still carrying it.

I have seen this happen quite often. You feel guilty for years and yet the person you feel you hurt doesn’t even remember the indiscretion. Isn’t it time to let yourself off the hook? You are not responsible for how someone else feels.

7. You were doing the best you could at the time.

People make poor choices when that is what has been modeled for them. People hurt others when they are in pain and do not know a better way. This is not an excuse to hurt again but is a simple truth. Find your way to the light and you make it far more possible to avoid hurting yourself or others in the future.

8. Acknowledging that you were not doing the best you could helps you learn the lesson now and make the amends you need to.

If you truly believe that you knew better and hurt someone anyway then use this as an opportunity to acknowledge this, make amends as necessary, and forgive yourself. Continuing to belittle yourself hurts not only you but also those around you. Use this opportunity to get conscious and transform that negative energy into love, perhaps through service or sharing your story.

9. Everything happens for a reason and with forgiveness you can surrender into this supportive belief.

What if there really was a higher power and the person you hurt was supposed to receive the very lessons they got because of what happened in the past? I believe in a good universal power that can heal everything. It is time to let your guilt go and trust that the person you hurt is supported in the same manner you are. If they have passed on they are in a beautiful place of lightness and freedom, and they would not want you to continue to hurt.

10. The past is gone and the present moment is all you really have.

The past is an illusion and the future is a dream. Everything good is here right now. In this moment, as you are reading this article, take notice of your breath and how you are feeling. Look around. In this moment all is perfect and forgiven.

I hope you have found the Top Ten Reasons to Forgive Your Past helpful. Everything I teach I have also worked through myself.

Coaching Tip: Think about one thing you have not been able to forgive yourself for and journal about it. Make sure to give yourself enough alone and quiet time to write until there is no more to say. When you’re done, burn or tear up your journal pages and get rid of that negative energy. You no longer need it. Release it and live free of it from now on.


Beauty, Joy….and Forgiveness,

Brenda Adelman

© Copyright 2009 Brenda Adelman

Want to reprint this article in your ezine or website? You may, as long as it remains intact and you include this complete blurb with it: Brenda Adelman, MA in Spiritual Psychology, referred to as The Queen of Forgiveness, teaches people who have a lot to offer but are stuck, how to become present, enjoy more success and peace in their relationships and lives by letting go of old and new resentments using the art of forgiveness. For FR*EE tips on how to finally be happy and free visit https://forgivenessandfreedom.com.